Domestic Drama

So we have recently read in the headlines about the twisted ordeal between R&B sensations Chris Brown and Rihanna. Alledgedly on Sunday Febuary 8th 2009 Chris brown got into a verbal altercation with said female in question (Rihanna) and then the argument turned physical. The press is saying he was booked on a "domestic violence felony criminal threat incident" Police reports claim that the woman in question had visible marks on her body when they arrived and Chris Brown had already left the scene. Chris Brown turned himself in at 6:30pm and was booked by 7:45pm. The press later started saying that Rihanna is possibly the female in question. Chris Brown and Rihanna both pulled out of Sundays Grammy Awards lineup. Rihannas rep insist it was because of a "car accident" the singer was involved in. Now I don't know facts because I wasn't there. This information is all based on what the press and the L.A. police department have confirmed. I was in shock when I read about this situation. I had heard something last night about them both pulling out of the show, but because I had to leave for work I didn't hear anything else about it untill yesterday morning. I am sickened by the situation. Domestic violence is a horrible and painful ordeal. I've seen comments people have made saying "Well she probally deserved it." NO ONE deserves to be beaten. Not by anyone. Especially by the one they love. Male or female, it is wrong. There is no such thing as "love taps" or "playful punches" There are no excuses. I grew up watching my mother and father fight and argue, and on both sides I saw someone throw the first punch. People ask me "How can you be close to your father after seeing that?" and It's hard, but my mom wasn't completely innocent. They were both wrong. Hitting someone is never justifiable. Not in a situation with anyone much less someone you're supposed to love. I was 15 when I got into a relationship with my sons father. (He's 2 years and some odd months older than me.) It was 6 months to the day we got together that he showed the first signs of an abusive nature. We got into a little argument (I dont even remember for what) and he pushed me into a wall. All I could do was cry. I was speechless. We broke up for a few days, but I was young and in love. We got back together and within the next month it happened again. This time was over me telling him I didn't love him during an argument. He punched me in my leg. I had a bruised thigh for weeks. This cycle never ended. The progression got worst. I kept making excuses for his and my behavior. It was so unhealthy for us both. I am not denying my actions or my reactions. I did play a part in the confrontations, and I did hit back. (still NOT right) I ended up in the hospital twice. Both times needing stitches. Once for a busted lip, and the next for a gash on my eye. It was almost a year and a half later I found out I was pregnant. I thought now is a reason for us to get along. We HAD to get shit right, this time. No more arguments, no more fights, and no more hitting. I was wrong. It wasn't untill I was 2 months pregnant and we got into an argument and he threw a beer bottle at my stomach!! My stomach, WHERE OUR BABY WAS. That I realized "I have to get out." I couldn't try and help US anymore. I couldn't even help myself. And now I wasn't just living for myself. This didn't just affect US. I had a life inside of me. This affected MY BABY.

I left. I walked out with the clothes on my back, and one booksack of personal things. Was it hard? "Yes" Was it worth it? "Yes" I am alive, I am healthy, I am happy, and no one will ever beat me down again. I gave birth to my beautiful baby boy on June 7th 2006 and I know I lived for him. "Us" has a whole new meaning to me now. Us, is my son and I. The ones that matter most. Each year an estimated 3.3 million children are exposed to physical or verbal violence. Research shows that 80 to 90 percent of children living in homes where there is domestic violence are aware of the violence. I couldn't have that for my son. I couldn't have that for either of us. I want everyone to realize that this isn't just a man beating on a woman or a child. This can happen in all shapes and forms. In no way is it ever right. Woman can beat men. (it happens) that dosen't make it OK. It's just as bad. Please if you or someone you know is involved in a violent situation with a loved one get help, or help them get help. Pain is not love, and love should not hurt. These things affect EVERYONE! My prayers go out to Rihanna, and also Chris Brown through these times. I hope they both get help and overcome this.
Awareness is essential to change this world.

Stop the cycle.
Need Help?
http://www.avhotline.org